No Pain, No Gain? I Guess.

I usually go to step aerobics class 3 or 4 times a week. It's almost always the same teacher, Brenda. I like Brenda, but I do wish there was a little more variety. Yesterday I got my wish. Brenda was out sick, so we had a substitute. At first I was excited. Yay! A new routine! Maybe new moves!

My enthusiasm for the substitute was dampened from the very beginning, when he showed up 5 minutes late. I was willing to forgive him for this, but then he spent the next 5 minutes flipping through his CDs. He didn't even bother to check to see that the stereo had no CD player (which I agree, is insane, but whatever, it doesn't have one). We finally got started 10 minutes late, and he kept slipping and falling all over the place, because he had snow on the bottoms of his shoes. Which was kind of funny. But since he had the music so loud, I couldn't hear what he was saying, so it became impossible to follow him.

We did about 20 minutes of a fairly simple routine, and then the fun really began. For the next 30 minutes, he had us doing straight lunges, squats, and various other aerobic torture devices, with no routine in sight. The reason I like aerobics is because it's like dance class. I don't mind doing lunges or squats if it's part of a larger picture, and there's choreography involved. I am not athletic. This workout reminded me of a boot camp class I once took by accident. (and only once, thank you). It was not fun. And I really believe if you're going to work out, you need to enjoy it, otherwise you won't stick with it.

The other thing that happened at the gym last night happened in the locker room. I was listening to two women talking (please, like you don't listen to other people's conversations? you can't help it) about one woman's diet plan. This was possibly the most insane dieting idea I have ever heard. Crazy Woman said she's been forcing herself to stay awake every night to burn more calories! Her friend seemed concerned, and said, "Well, I get sick if I don't get 8 hours of sleep every night." I hear ya, Concerned Friend. Crazy Woman says, "Well, me too. But it will be worth it once I lose weight." Concerned Friend asks, "So, what are you doing do burn more calories? Jumping jacks in the middle of the night?" Crazy Woman says, "No, just watching TV." Concerned Friend, seeming like she might laugh, "So how much have you lost?" Crazy Woman: "Not one ounce." Concerned Friend: "So, you are just going to exhaust yourself to lose weight?" Crazy Woman: "That is the plan. I always lose weight if I am sick and exhausted." Hum, watch out Dr. Atkins. I see a new fad diet on the horizon.